Snowden: Bear Grylls Ain't got Shit on Me!

So I am an adventurer, with that comes peril. My spirits high and full of carbs I bravely got a lift from a friend and his sister to Wales to face Snowden, which is the second highest mountain in the U.K. Take that wikipeaks. The way there was lovely we got coffees and laughed generally having a grand old time.  Seeing road signs that look like a dyslexic game of scrabble taking well-meaning swipes at the locals. Arriving laughing we got some provisions crisp flap jacks and lucazade, we clearly were ready for this, so called mountain. The first part was photos and a hard walk, some beautiful scenery. My friend Chris has the photos, we were so young so care free so tried and sweaty. Then came what I can only describe as akin to a gravity hack on a pc game I was on a mountain, really high up, above the birds. I had casually vomited twice through fatigue feeling at one with nature. I had a panic attack. I got over the hardest bit and was basically walking when I spied a path which seemed to my keen outdoorsmen like eyes as close. Pitching a fit and basically crying I shouted Bear Grills ain’t got shit on me and headed straight down. I had Redox classics on one of my many cocky moves that would prove my heart, nerve and stupidity. I slipped like a man! Oh I was manly. I remember thinking this is how I die and just accepting it. Landing like a gymnast I shouted I am alive trying to stand, my second worst idea. Some people called mountain rescue and we waited while I went into shock laughing like a mental and cursing anything welsh. Dragons, leaks, Gavin and Stacey, Rob Brydon, Tom Jones and Daffodils it’s good to keep your mind active in this situations. I had fallen 10-15 meters and I was alive. Chris and Alex Lehane siblings, kept me entertained and alive and I love them. I caused them so much embarrassment and I didn’t care. I was alive. The hospital was a blur of drugs laughing gas and Chris flicking my nipples while I was in a neck brace. I fell off  a mountain but I had lived we’ll call this one a draw Wales.

This is only short because typing with one had is a shit. Oh yeah dislocated my shoulder.